You guys ever get asked dumb questions by friends/family/co-workers when it comes to kayaking?

 

I have a couple kayaking photos hanging up in my office that instigate comments once in awhile.  Just a minute ago an admin from another department saw the pics and asked me about them. 

 

Her:   "So is there a group you pay that sets those things up for you"?

 

Me:  "Uhh, no we drive ourselves up there"

 

Her:   "Oh cool.   Hey, did you hear they're bringing artificial snow up to   Snoqualmie Pass so they can open one of the hills this weekend??"

 

Me:    O'rly?? 

 

 

I know I'm being a bit hard on 'em, but wow they come off as funny.

 

Here's the one I hear the most:

 

Sooo, do you go with anyone when you do that??

 

 

I'm sure the raft guides out there can share plenty of good ones......

 

 

"How deep is the river?"

"Do we take out back at the put in?"

"So, what do you do for a living?"

 

And the classic answer to the question "How many times have you been down this river?"

..... "Counting this time and the next, that'll make two."

   Uhhhh,  the bottom?

 

At what elevation do the deer become elk?

 

No serious are there any wildlife biologist around? 

 

 

Here are two classic Grand Canyon guide yarns:

 

Side Hill Galoots: This animal is a cousin of the bighorn sheep. It has shorter legs on one side of it's body to facilitate walking on the steep talus slopes. How does it travel in the other direction, you ask? Why ma'am, it heads the other direction by swimming across the river to the other side so it's short legs will always be uphill.

 

Indian Dick Rapid: This is actually a real rapid in the "Roaring Twenties" section of the canyon, near mile 23. As you approach the rapid a tall rock formation appears on river right, directly alongside the rapid. While this formation is actually a large, wide slab that has fallen from the right side cliff, from upstream you are only seeing the edge and it looks a lot like a giant, well, er, ah, ahem... dick. Think 150' phallus here folks. Pretty impressive if you're into that kind of thing.  

 

Typically what happens goes something like this: Boat is approaching rapid. Guide casually mentions that this rapid is named "Indian Dick". At least one passenger never fails to ask who Indian Dick was.  Guide says something like "He was a famous beaver trapper back in the day". As the boat gets closer to the rapid the formation comes into view in all it's glory. Usually one of the quick witted passengers notices the unmistakable namesake of Indian Dick and starts to laugh out loud, pointing it out to everyone else. Guide is all smiles and knows he/she will likely get a good tip at the end of the trip.

 Damn Canuks call it all canoeing

That Carlton Draft was made from beer!

 

Imagine that!